For so many individuals a balanced life has become as elusive as catching a cloud. Society's pressures and stresses have moved people away from being in balance with themselves and their surrounding and into a frantic position of constant - and often needless - motion. People have become spinning tops caught in a perpetual state of inertia.
Relaxation even has to be scheduled! What does that say about our view of life and of ourselves? Balance is not something that one does on a mat for a few hours a week, it is a way of life. Prioritizing one's health, family, love, contentment, and living in the now, are all important elements of balance. How can one feel balanced when he or she is always looking at what needs to be done in the future and...when they have not really lived in the present?
What happens if the future doesn't come? Will you have spent your "nows" ignoring their importance for the sake of something that never happened? That doesn't mean that a person shouldn't plan for the future. But...it does mean that he or she shouldn't be obsessed by it.
To be balanced, at least by my standards, also means to understand the difference between "working to live" and "living to work." It means looking at what's around you and understanding that it could change at any time and that you should "take it all in" and enjoy it. In addition, it is an ability to create a "level plane" for yourself, so that you don't get too high with the "highs" or low with the "lows." And - to be able to laugh robustly - especially at yourself, as well as recognize how to put life in perspective. Plus...it takes a realization that life is always changing. That's just inherent in the state of existence.
One of the things I have learned over the years is that (and I've said this many times before) we create our on constructs, then...often live by them, stress over them, and lose sight of what's truly worthwhile in being alive on this planet. The secret is actually not a secret at all...it's staring you in the face. It's in every person you see, love, and care about. It's recognizing that those you love and who love you in return want you around and not some fancy toy in your stead. It's the mountains, rivers, streams, and sky. It's everything in the universe. And...it's admiring all that while you're here - not letting it pass you by in the humdrum of running around as you focus on what can be, as opposed to what is.
Balance is enjoying now. Knowing that each now will never be here again. Balance may include planning, but...it's overwhelmingly about being present every moment of your life.
No matter who you are or where you live, you have an effect on those you interact with. Your energy sends a message to the people and other beings around you. Do you exude knowledge, wisdom, excitement, innovation, fun, happiness, contentment, kindness, compassion, and/or love? Or...does your energy give off arrogance, stubbornness, ignorance, hate, intolerance, negativity, paranoia, lack of confidence and low self-esteem?
Whatever it is that you convey, others (both human and other animals - and some may argue...even the greater energy of universe) can readily "pick it up" and feel its effects. Having others look forward to your presence and feel comfortable around you is not always an inherent trait. It can be, rather easily, learned if you're willing to spend the time to open your mind and heart to understand you strengths and overcome your weaknesses.
The first step is to understand who you are. "Look" at yourself when you converse with others. How and what does your tone of voice, body language, content of your message, and use of words, convey to others. Step back and watch yourself. Are you a person who displays the type of energy that evokes positive emotions, or do you repulse others and cause them to rapidly move away, physically and/or mentally, from you. If you are too judgmental, it can be relatively certain that those around you will "turn you off" after your negativity has been on constant display.
The easiest way to have a positive effect on others is to listen to them. We live in a world where listening has become a prized commodity. Since so many of us are pulled in an ever increasing amount of directions (see my previous post), our ability (or desire) to listen to others has - from a societal perspective - been stymied. Showing that you are willing to listen non-judgmentally, and REALLY actively doing it, can create a positive effect on how you are viewed and...make you one of the people that others want to interact with.
Listen and you well, most certainly, see.
Life for most people, especially those living in metropolitan areas, has become a frantic affair. So many things call for our attention. Work, play, school, family, friends, apps, social media, cell phones, smart phones, tablets, laptops, desktops, televisions with 800 channels, radios (both satellite and broadcast), CDs, DVDs, magazines, newspapers, books, and on and on and on, are constant diversions.
When I was "growing up" there were no computers or cell phones, television meant watching four networks. Then..."UHF" came along and three more channels were added. One's telephone transmission was apt to be over a "party line." Meaning, your family shared the line with another family and if you picked up your receiver you could hear the conversation of the people who shared your line. Sometimes, you'd have to interrupt them to ask if they were almost finished speaking so that you could make a call. Progress was achieved when you could afford to have a private line. Then REAL advancement came when "party lines" ceased to be.
Newspapers ruled. They were packed with stories and the Sunday edition weighed "a ton." For "paperboys" like me, it was the hardest day. Music came over your favorite radio station or on your turntable (we called them record players or victrolas), via records that were either 45 RPMs, 33 1/3 RPMs, or 78 RPMs. RPM stands for revolutions per minute.
Families ate dinner together. Food wasn't processed as it is today, there were no GMOs, and...the days events were actually discussed at the dinner table!
ADHD, as we know it, wasn't around back then. Perhaps it was because there were relatively so few things diverting our attention. Folks who did numerous things, seemingly at the same time, weren't thought of as multitaskers, they could just do lots of things "at once."
So how did we become societies filled with ADHDers? Easy, we created a "world" that has countless things vying for our attention. We drift from one thing to the next, often without finishing the first, because...we are "pulled away" by something new, "more important" more attractive, more interesting, or more entertaining. The choices we have today dwarf those of 40, 30, even 20 years ago. In fact. it's hard NOT to be diverted! Yet...leave it to the pharmaceutical industry to develop drugs to control ADHD and other related "ailments."
I have an easier solution. Slow down, don't look at your electronic devises on a constant basis, clear your mind, speak with your friends and family, relax more, stress less, and have fun. It'll save you from having to buy more things you think you "need" that you really don't, and...it may even cut down on your prescriptions too!
Business should be about passion. It's as simple as that. You should look forward to starting, building, working at, or conceptualizing your business and/or business day like you do when you think about, or have, your morning coffee or tea. Even if your business IS coffee and/or tea.
Why else would you want to go to work? Yes...I know it's about money. But, life only comes around once and if you're miserable at work, what's the point? Business success is derived from the energy you, and your team, put into it.
"Homework" is the drudgery of business, yet...it's essential. When I started my optical company I spent a lot of time dissecting the industry, its affect on population, the pricing policies and marketing of other companies, and the overall concept that people had of the field. Then, I "went to work." And - it worked! Researching if your product or service is needed may seem like it's taking time away from your goal, but...if you love what you're doing yet no one needs or wants it, I suggest you rethink your idea.
Once you've decided to "jump into the game" - and remember, business is a game - stay focused. Lay out your strategies and tactics, gather your resources, put your management and marketing plans together, and start rollin'! Whether you're creating something entirely new, or "improving" on something that already exists, you have to let people know. Marketing is the key!
Study marketing; it's effectiveness, when and how to use it, and who your customer/client base is. It doesn't have to take a lot of money, but...you should definitely be tenacious if you want to be successful. And...be sure you're ready to handle what you just told the world you're selling! Otherwise, it will all be for naught. I'm sure you don't want that to happen.
As we move forward, in both my blog posts and my videos, I'll be writing and speaking about the different aspects of creating business success. So...I suggest you check out my new video series, Soaring to Success™ on my youtube channel: DanG4u2 (as well as take a look at my other videos), follow my blog posts on the subject, and send me your questions and comments both here and in the comment section on youtube. I look forward to hearing from you. And, I invite you to get involved, but please - don't get stressed. After all...it's only business!
A short talk on analyzing your passions and how to make them productive.
Yes...it's true. Size really does matter. In fact, it not only effects your life - but it will certainly effect the lives of others as well.
No, I'm not talking about an outward physical trait. What I'm addressing here is the size of a few things that are far more important. How "big" is your heart? How "broad" is your mind?
Living with a "big heart" and a "broad mind" enables you to spread good energy, see things in a more accepting manner, and allows you to learn more easily. A "narrow mind" and "closed heart" tends to drive people, who may add texture, love, and kindness, to your life...away. What you are left with are only those with the same "closed heart" perspective and "narrow mindset" as yourself. That will, most assuredly, limit your view of life and will stunt your ability to grow as well.
However, the toughest part is to be able to admit to yourself that you have a "closed heart" and a "narrow mind." It takes a lot of intestinal fortitude to recognize one's shortcomings. And...even more to want to change. A "broad, or open, mind" and a "big heart" may cause a person discomfort at first because it goes against what one has "stood for" his or her entire life. Yet...once they are achieved a person frees himself, or herself, from the negative energy and the physical affects that a "small heart" and a "narrow mind" causes.
If you've ever be around negative people (or you are one yourself), their faces emit the affects that their negativity creates. A positive person is lighter, happier, and less stressed. Closing one's heart and one's mind will, ultimately, increase one's stress and also cause physical ailments.
So...be aware of the "size" of your heart and mind. Open them both. It will allow you the freedom to pass on an overly stressful and judgmental life. And - give you the rewards that go with a "big heart" and a "broad mind."
A quick look at our intrinsic power and how to use it.
My take on authenticity and mental trash within the context of trust, love, and compassion.
Or...banking on the fact that: "People can never get enough of what they don't really need."
For years I owned a marketing firm. Still dabble in it. In fact...I teach it at the university level.
During my firm's early years I had a partner who had worked for a well-known national magazine. He was the publisher of special guides that would come out during the year focusing on different categories of products. Cars, electronics, clothes, etc. would be the highlighted in all their beauty. I remember him saying that they would be lighted and displayed in such a way as to make them "sensual."
Yes...sex (and anything else that gratifies the senses) sells, even when that sensuality is transmitted through things. Mind you, I'm not talking about some beautiful being standing next to an automobile or holding a bottle of wine...I'm speaking about the things themselves.The textures, colors, designs, and other facets that go into the manufacturing of an item are often more important than it's function or reliability. And - the lighting and positioning of that product when it's photographed do as much to make them desirable as their design.
People are easily seduced...very easily seduced. Most consumers buy first with their eyes, then...secondly, with their minds. How does one avoid the trap of the "sensual seduction of things?" Initially, one has to realize that it exists. Next, I would suggest asking the question, "Do I really need this?" The answer is probably "No!" Then...comes the "want factor." Ah...the naughtiness of it all. Marketers depend on that. Now, I'm not saying that's a bad thing. But - I'm certainly not saying it's a good things either. The job of the marketers is to get you to buy what, quite often, you really don't need. I regularly add to that statement: "With money you don't really have."
Motorcycles, cars, clothes, shoes, electronic devices, food, as well as just about every other area of "Thingdom," is made to make you want to salivate, desire, caress, "love," and possess them. They are our substitutes for the real thing...other people.
As I teach, write, train, discuss, and guide people in their pursuit of building their businesses and selling their products, I am not ignorant to the fact that, if people truly love other people and have a wonderful relationship with their friends and loved one...the need for things often diminishes. But - I also know that we are beings who also love to create as well. So - balance, it seems, is the key. Work towards achieving entrepreneurial Nirvana, while making sure to remember that people are always more important than things. That - should help make for a totally "sense-ual" existence!
Life coaching has become a catch-all phrase used by all sorts of people and organizations to promote a better, happier, more productive, and successful life. Some people opt for schools (a relatively new phenomenon) that certify folks to be a coach. Of course...who certifies the schools and, more importantly...who certifies and monitors the certifying agency and the certifiers? It's a question, I, and many others have asked. And, just like any other schools and those who attended them, your teacher could have graduated at the top of his or her class or the bottom - yet no one ever asks. In fact - when was the last time you asked your doctor his or her rank in their graduating class? My guess is...never. That notwithstanding, I tip my hat to the thousands of qualified coaches who help millions of people everyday!
I've been coaching people for many, many, years. So long in fact, that I actually had hair on my head when I started and my beard was all dark! I love helping people and thoroughly enjoy it when I, and they, see real progress in their lives. Getting people to understand who they are and why and how they do things, opens up doors for them that they may never have realized. Finding new success in their lives, whether from a business perspective, materialistically, emotionally, or spiritually, never ceases to make me feel wonderful.
One of the greatest things a life coach can experience is when his or her client moves away from fear, insecurity, low self-esteem, jealousy, anger, hate, and self-sabotaging and self-defeating behaviors, and begins to find the person they were hoping to be their entire life.
I began formally coaching in 1972 when I worked with my employees to help them grow and live a happier, more successful life. Now...I coach and train groups, both large (amphitheaters, huge hotel meeting rooms, and banquet halls), and small (corporate conference rooms, classrooms, and individuals' homes and offices). We're, both my clients and myself, always learning. That's why I see my capacity as a university professor as an extension of my coaching and training. I also love the fact that I continue to, through the magic of computers and teleconferencing, coach people all over this amazing planet.
If you are a life coach or have, or will, use the services of a life coach...I salute you. If you're stuck, feel "down," are looking to reach the potential you've always thought you could, want to be more content, happier, more enlightened, have better relationships, or just want to experience that "balance" so many people seem to have lost...perhaps the guidance of a coach can help. But - ultimately, it's up to you to make sure your journey is fruitful.